October 18, 1998
I have been going to support groups off and on for a couple of years. People who have Lupus can share common experiences. Usually Im the only man because it affects women so much more. The women are all so open. Theyre usually on Prednisone, a steroid which makes them gain a lot of weight so they have to deal with their self-esteem on top of everything else. Im ambivalent about the meetings. I see the people and a lot of them are much sicker than me or they know someone who died recently. Should I be grateful as Im not as badly off. But I dont want to deal with this shit anymore. Our moderator passed away recently. Ive made some friends, but its hard to do anything since were not always feeling great.